Crows are scary
- use tools
- Can be taught to speak (like parrots)
- Have huge brains for birds
- like seriously their brain-to-body size ratio is equal to that of a chimpanzee
- They vocalize anger, sadness, or happiness in response to things
- they are scary smart at solving puzzles
- some ravens stay with their mates until one of them dies
- they can remember faces
- SIDENOTE HERE BECAUSE HOLY SHIT. They did an experiment where these guys wore masks and some of them fucked with crows. Pretty soon the crows recognized the masks = douchebag. But the nice guys with masks they left alone. THEN, OH WE’RE NOT DONE, NO SIR crows that WEREN’T EVEN IN THE EXPERIMENT AND NEVER SAW THE MASK BEFORE knew about mask-dudes and attacked them on sight. THEY PASSED ON THE FUCKING INFORMATION TO THEIR CROW BUDDIES.
- They remember places where crows were killed by farmers and change their migration patterns.
Guys I’m really scared of crows now.
i love crows so much
crows are amazing
My favorite legend is that crows are the souls of the dead
crows are the coolest shit
Yeah but have you seen this
every time I see this I just see
How to make a grilled cheese sandwich
This is so accurate. At school, we literally have children who will watch our facial expressions to see if them falling is as bad as they think it might be.
CORRECT CHILD INJURY PROCEDURE:
- do not react. at the most, maybe wince and go “ooooh”
- go over to the child to assess panic level and severity of injury
- if they’re like, dying, remain calm, but they’re probably not.
- look them in the eye and ask, “you okay?” they will nod. possibly all teary-eyed. then ask, “are we gonna need to cut it off?”
- the child is thrown off. if they giggle, you’re in the money. if they do not, put a bandaid on and do some sympathetic patting. they are probably a little teary. let the sad little bug sit out for a minute. they will quickly get bored.
- works every time
An old friend of mine’s son would shit the ground HARD. And laugh it off because hey Mom didn’t panic. So he cried only when it, you know, actually hurt.
I’m 27 and I still panic when my mom panics first.
(special thanks to David for inspiration)
This is an amazing book
is this real life
Looks like our man Bashir is coming to GOT
*screams like a ferengi*
Hope he kept those holodeck costumes
He spent a lot of time flying.
He learnt to communicate with birds and discovered that their conversation was fantastically boring. It was all to do with wind speed, wingspans, power-to-weight ratios and a fair bit about berries. Unfortunately, he discovered, once you have learnt birdspeak you quickly come to realize that the air is full of it the whole time, just inane bird chatter. There is no getting away from it.
For that reason Arthur eventually gave up the sport and learnt to live on the ground and love it, despite a lot of the inane chatter he heard down there as well.
It can be very dangerous to see things from somebody else’s point of view without the proper training.
There was a sign-up sheet for bringing food to a cookout tomorrow, and one of my friends (foolishly) wrote “unicorn jerky” next to my name.
I accepted the challenge.
The jerky is regular beef jerky with various decorations. I bought edible adhesive and mixed it with some pearly dust stuff usually used for fondant, then painted it onto each piece. Then I sprinkled it with little gold stars and pink sugar sprinkles. The unicorn horns, are, obviously, carrots with the same decorations… minus the pink sugar because sugar + carrots = bleah. Carving them was fun.
Sometimes I just feel inexplicably guilty for all the plants I’ve neglected to death.
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